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They suffer immensely, but they are just as much themselves after the rape as before.
Another rape victim I dated was a butch woman who had just adopted a kitten that completely befuddled her.
I was repeatedly singled out for sexual attention of sexually directed harassment before I was even a teenager.
Or to be so up front.“I may be a lesbian because of what happened to me, I don’t know.
It doesn’t really matter at this point.”I guess, maybe in some way, I didn’t expect her to be so it.
I also think that I was so lucky to have gone on those dates with those women, because I already had a deep understanding that people who have experienced sexual violence aren’t any less awesome or less complete than those who haven’t experienced it.
Without that understanding, I think admitting to yourself that you have experienced sexual violence is harder, because you also have to think of yourself as “broken.”I continued to wonder about why I had been so dismissive about how painful I found that experience, and at the heart of it was “it was just a more extreme version of how I always feel with men.” I came out as bisexual when I was around 12 years old (or “was outed” I should say) and ever since then, I have faced a lot of unwanted sexual attention.
I sat a meditation retreat for 7 days, and the first 5 days were spent crying.
I was completely exhausted, and in discussions with my teacher I basically said “I can’t keep doing this” and she basically said “keep trying.” Then, sometime around the fifth day, I stopped crying. Not totally better, not like, I don’t still cry sometimes.
One of my male friends was standing outside a club when he was hit from behind.
He fell down, and two guys came up and kicked the shit out of him before running away. We used to do jiu jitsu together, but he had a particular drive that I think was borne of that experience. Yet, when men get beat up, I don’t ever entertain the impression that some part of them may have been destroyed.
So, when I started dating men for real, I was already primed to not complain when I felt this feeling.
Sometimes, however, it was so bad it broke through my numbness.
I had expected some sort of catharsis, or release, or knowledge or something, but it wasn’t like that. It was just like — this nameless sadness that seemed to have no bottom ran out, and where it had been there was nothing.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating